|
Ah, the new
year. A time for all to re-assess their position in life and make
appropriate changes. When it comes to owning an iguana, there are
definitely resolutions to be considered.
From the iguana's point of view:
-
Resolve to take advantage of every
opportunity to worry the human. Just subtle things, like not eating,
not pooping, not moving.....don't overdo it though, lest it involves a
trip to the vet's office. (Ugh!)
-
Resolve to poop on the newest item left
unattended in the immediate area.
-
Resolve to chase the human into the
corner whenever possible and scare the bee-jeebers out of their friends.
-
Resolve to enter mating season with a
vengeance and not let up for 3 months solid, including leaping from
great heights, slapping with the tail, and of course painting everything
with poop.
-
Resolve to chase the orange cat every
time it enters the room. (the gray cat is okay)
From the
human's point of view:
-
Resolve to buy clothes that are green and
gray instead of red, plaid, and/or orange. No need to aggravate the
situation with fighting colors.
-
Resolve to invest in a perimeter to avoid
having to carry a broom handle everywhere one's iguana goes during breeding season.
-
Resolve to not cuss and swear incessantly
when said male iguana insists on sneaking across the room and sitting on
human's computer and knocking everything in the way on the floor even if
it's fragile.
-
Resolve to build iguana his own house so
human can move about freely without fear of being stalked.
-
Resolve to fence in yard so iguana can
run loose in summer without intimidating all who pass by on the
sidewalk. (something about a free-roaming 63" iguana that causes many
to cross the street)
And the last resolution by both:
Wouldn't change a
thing.....makes life interesting.
|